The Man In The Mirror Is The Man You Chose To be

Blame.

I was talking to a couple of people today, some sort of group  I was introduced to,reading books and telling their stories, angry depressed,sad and dark..and I got a little pissed off and lashed out and everyone didn't understand why..
Why were you so mad Jackie? 
They were just a couple of young men women talking about what their fathers did to them, what their mothers did to them, their uncles,  and how these people made them who they are today,how ruined their childhood was..their family their friends,bullies, being the reason that they were miserable, sad, depressed, unachieved, and lacking confidence... and some even jobless..throwing stones at their past and never letting go.. 

I understand why they were mad at me, I have never been through anything like that,except bullying so I couldn't ever possibly understand, my judgement and anger was uncalled for. Childhood is a fragile stage and one screw up could ruin a lot for one in the future, that I understand


Well here's what made me mad, I hate blame.. I love that they're talking about it and releasing it, but everyone should just learn to let go,forgiving and forgetting is the best feeling in the world! These people are not the reason you are like that, you're like that because you chose to hold on to that, sleep to it and cry about it every night and never move on. The world is terrible, shit happens, stop wishing on a superman,theres no super man to save you, save yourself.
Holding no grudge at all, no anger at all, this anger imprisons you and makes you blame other people for the person you are.No matter what happened to you, you cant blame someone else for the person you are,Don't blame someone else for the person you chose to be, unless there are other circumstances, you have a choice on who you are to become, who you will become. What anybody did to you in 1996 should not matter.
This one person cannot hold you back from blossoming to the butterfly that you are.This one person is holding you back and making you remain this caterpillar Forever? From Beyond the grave, from 10 years ago, from a gazillion miles they are controlling you, you're letting them do it too, with a fork and a knife and a chopping board laid out and you're the table...they're chopping on you, you're choice...you might have not had a choice then, you do now.

We're good at playing victims, I was hurt,I'm supposed to cry,forever. I was beaten, I'm supposed to be scared forever. I was almost killed, I shall live in this house forever and never come out, coz I might get killed again. 
It doesn't work like that, Stop victimizing yourself and stretch, stretch out of this box you have placed yourself in and you put the blame of your life on, blame of all the things we cant be coz we fear to be but we find it much easier to blame the person who 'screwed us up' We wouldn't have been screwed up if we walked away,learned and battled it out of our system.  Soo many people have had worse happening to them but made the best of their lives!
Maybe I'm not the best person to be saying this, you can say I don't how it feels, but when i see you, hurting and burning coz of a past you choose re-live, a past you chose to blame your failures on, It hurts me too...that you're holding yourself back and your blaming it on people and past long gone dead, who have no effect on the present or future but you let it control you. You're stronger than that. 
That is why I was mad.
You Are Who you are because you chose to be who are, No one put a gun on your head and said 'Be depressed, sad and useless and drink a tonne of alcohol when you're at it' you chose that...your choices,your emotion, your memory.